Remember four years ago, I wanted to buy a car. After a period of assessment, it was decided to buy a medium blue car. At that time, my impression was that most people buy white or black cars, so I have to choose a unique, this can show personal taste. While I was smug about buying myself a different car, I suddenly found that there were many cars of the same color as my car on the highway, in the alley, even in the parking lot of the building where I lived.

I'm beginning to wonder why people suddenly start buying blue cars? I share this sudden discovery with my colleagues around me. "I didn't see a lot of blue cars, but I found a lot of pregnant women.Last week, I went to the department store and saw six pregnant women in just two hours ." And she said this phenomenon, I and other colleagues did not find, thought, her discovery is probably coincidental!

Later, when I heard a speech, I learned that this phenomenon was psychologically called "retinal effect ". Simply put, when we own something or a feature, we pay more attention to whether others have it like us.

Mr. Carnegie argued long ago that 80% of each person's traits are strengths, while about 20% are our shortcomings. When a person only knows his own shortcomings, but does not know the advantages, the "retinal effect" will urge the person to find that there are many people around him with similar shortcomings, so that his interpersonal relationship can not be improved, life will not be happy.

To be popular and popular, one must have the ability to appreciate and affirm oneself. Because in the operation of the retinal effect, a person who sees his own advantages has the ability to see the merits of others. And can look at others with positive attitude, often is the necessary condition of good interpersonal relationship.

Using both Chinese and English philosophical stories to expand our Chinese Beihaimandarin Reading Material , you can also read more Chinese materials through Beihai Chinese Vblog to further improve your Chinese hearing level.

    Edited by Baoyang from Shanghai Beihaimandarin

记得四年前，我想要买一部车。经过一段时间的评估后，决定买一部蓝色的中型轿车。当时我的印象是一般人的车都买白色或黑色，所以自己要选一个独特的，这才能显出个人的品位。正在我为自己买了一辆与众不同的车子而沾沾自喜时，却突然发现，不论是在高速路上，还是在小巷子里，甚至是我住的大楼的停车场中，都有许多与我车子同型同色的轿车。

       后来有一次听演讲，才了解到这种现象在心理学上叫做“视网膜效应”。简单地说，就是当我们自己拥有了一件东西或一项特征时，就会更加注意别人是否跟我们一样具备这种特征。

     卡耐基先生很久前就提出一个论点，即每个人的特质中有80%是长处，而20%左右是我们的缺点。当一个人只知道自己的缺点，而不知发觉优点时，“视网膜效应”就会促使这个人发现他身边也有许多人拥有类似的缺点，进而使他的人际关系无法改善，生活也不会快乐。

      一个人要人缘好、要受人欢迎，一定要有欣赏自己和肯定自己的能力。因为在“视网膜效应”的运作下，一个看到自己优点的人，才有能力看到他人的可取之处。而能用积极的态度看待他人，往往是人际关系好的必备条件。